Not Your Mama's Bus Tour (continued)

 

The bus wound its way toward the old Cook County Hospital, scheduled to crumble under a wrecking ball when a new hospital takes over sometime this fall. With the theme music from the hit TV show "ER" playing in the background, Curly explained that Cook County sees a staggering 5,000 people a day, most of whom are low-income patients.

Curly dryly described the "Toothless Olympics" — the Oral Surgery Clinic at County Hospital. Here's the drill: Beginning at 7 a.m., would-be clients must call, and call, and call to try to get a number between 1 and 70 — this allows them the privilege to show up at the fire doors outside of the clinic at 7 a.m. the next morning. An officer from the Cook County Sheriff's office meets them at the door and opens it, at which point the lucky dentist-goers sprint down a hallway to a desk where they are given yet another number and ordered to wait on hard benches in the waiting area to see an oral surgeon. It is not uncommon to wait until 2 or 3 in the afternoon. Once inside, there is one option and one option only: pulling teeth.

Kay (Vendor #3969) and Michael Ibrahem wrap up the tour with song and dance.

The tour continued with other stories that touched, angered and amazed the audience. Richard Wallace recalled desperately searching for a place to spend an unseasonably cold fall night; the aging Kay (Vendor #3969) proudly explained that in her youth she danced in Orchestra Hall and performed an expertly executed Irish jig on the sidewalk; Michael Ibrahem described how he began to come to terms with his sexuality as a 10-year-old hat vendor on Maxwell Street. Poetry, music and personal anecdotes filled the time in between performances.

From Michigan Avenue to the former "no-man's land" now occupied by the University of Illinois at Chicago, from the Monroe Street site of the butchering of the Black Panther leadership to the "open-air hotel" in the park fronting the Newberry Library, this is definitely Not Your Mama's Bus Tour.

-- Gina Buccola